London’s a theater treat

I was in London. Ever hear of Norwegian Air? This least-expensive airline is half the cost to Paris, Rome, Ireland, the Caribbean. Norwegian Air flies the new fastest planes — 5 ¹/₂ hours to London. With push-buttons to tint the oversize windows so no curtains, no glare — 100 percent great.

However, Gatwick, a Third World airport further than Bulgaria, discarded my allowed size hair spray, fragrance, hand lotion and 12 other things. The Mother Country’s TSA agents out-tough Meghan.

But … the most glorious, grand Edwardian five-star hotel is the Milestone. A mini Downton Abbey, sister of Ireland’s Ashford Castle, the Milestone is antiques, art, butlers, Penhaligon’s amenities, rooms with brocades, silks, your own imprinted calling cards, homemade granola, personal recipes, afternoon tea.

Also, dog-friendly. Come without your own, and they’ll get you one for the day.

An aura of privilege, it’s another world. Created by South Africa’s Stanley Tollman — who always wore a red carnation — this Red Carnation hotel fronts Kensington Palace, where Queen Victoria was born, Princess Diana lived, William, Kate & Co. playhouse, and Mr. & Mrs. Prince Harry will make do.

I crossed over into Kensington Palace’s park. Everyone’s into the Harry marry. To watch the I Do’s, the Prince of Wales pub even suggests cut-rate tankards of ale.

The spit on this Brit twit prince who once dressed as a Nazi: In Grandma’s whole queendom he couldn’t find one English girl with proper credentials? A local grande dame, meowing the bride is no amateur professionally or personally, recalls her on holiday inquiring about meeting some rich gent.

In 1948, sheep grazed on Kensington Palace grounds. So, about pulling the wool over someone’s eyes … the whisper is in a few years comes a producer with a script and PDQ she makes shepherd’s pie out of HRH.

Anyway, the “Today” show and other TV-niks vying to cover the ceremony are looking to bunk at the Milestone.

‘Chicago’ Cuba-style
London’s a theater treat. There’s a Tina Turner bio musical en route here. Plus Marlene Dietrich and Tyrone Power’s oldie film, “Witness for the Prosecution,” staged inside a government building as the courtroom. And “Chicago,” which I’ve seen more often than the city, starring Cuba Gooding Jr.

At the Ivy restaurant afterward, Cuba said: “Dancing, singing onstage, only three-week rehearsal, I was terrified at first. I’ve been a pro boxer, gymnast, hockey player, and this was the hardest thing to do. Flying in, no sleep, jet lag, time change, my body was on stand-by.”

Donald, get out and see sights
I’d packed British money left over from some long-ago visit. For a ride to the West End, I handed it to a London cabbie. He handed it back. The pound notes were not only out of print, they were out of existence. He asked how old they were. I didn’t know. He said they dated to Henry VIII.
President Donald, who’ll follow my footsteps shortly, must see London’s funky Portobello Road. Visit the Tower of London. See Buckingham’s Changing of the Guard. Assess the Crown Jewels. Breakfast near the Ritz at the popular Wolseley which, when my English money worked, was a car showroom.

Stick the limo and hop their underground. Gaze at Big Ben. Sail the River Thames. Shop Regent Street. Bond Street. Savile Row. Do the House of Lords. Victoria and Albert Museum. Poke around Windsor Castle. Snack on bubble and squeak. Or toad in the hole, which is pork sausage in dough drowning in gravy.

Meanwhile, masses, hordes, crates of humanity who missed reading me the week I took off stormed the gates.

To quell such massive riots, S. Lynch, our editor-in-chief, printed daily bulletins graciously explaining I hadn’t drowned, nor was hauled away kicking and screaming but — like it or not — I’d be back today.

Such devotion is only in New York, kids, only in New York.

Source: Read Full Article